Monday, December 31, 2012

December 31

Chapter 73

The Rule of St. Benedict December 31


Here at the end of his Rule, St. Benedict models humility regarding his own work.  We can learn from his example and hold gently the good that comes from our lives, recognizing that it is by God's love and grace that we have been brought to the place we inhabit.

This final chapter is a good reminder at the end of the Rule that means to do not equal ends, and that it is the end, the goal, the telos of our life that is the priority.  We are formed by our Benedictine practices to find our true self at home with God, and to find God at home in our lives.  We are all beginners, and we will always need to begin again.

Let us adopt our Father Benedict's humility, then, and open ourselves to what we can learn from others on parallel journeys so that we might be formed more completely into the likeness of Christ.

Br. Chad 2012

Sunday, December 30, 2012

December 30

Chapter 72

The Rule of St. Benedict December 30


I read a book a while back that I've talked about often called Wisdom of the Benedictine Elders.  In it are profiles of and interviews with the oldest living Benedictines in the United States.  One of the questions put to each elder was "What is your favorite chapter in the Rule of Benedict?"  More than any other chapter, this one was said to be the favorite.

I find much resonance within this chapter as a lifelong church goer and as a vowed religious.  The first sentence rings true as a statement about every community I've ever spent time in.  There is something tangible about the zeal of a group, and the difference between evil and good zeal is as apparent as the difference between a touch of blessing and a slap in the face.  The evil zeal is bitterness, and it separates from God.  If our life's journey was represented on a map, the zeal of bitterness would point us in the direction opposite of where God's is at home.  The good zeal points us precisely in the direction of God's household and our true home.

The difference between these two zeals is found in the depths of our inner life, at the intersection of our emotions, desires, and will.  Good zeal must be cultivated and grown within by our consistent effort and by Divine Grace.  Good zeal is a purse that will not wear out, our treasure stored up in heaven.  Evil zeal is a storehouse of the possessions of our false self that inspire bitterness within as we watch them slowly disintegrate, eaten by rust and moth (Luke 12: 33,34).  We embody one zeal or the other in our lives and in our communities, and those with ears to hear, eyes to see, and hearts to feel will perceive it clearly.

Br. Chad 2012

Saturday, December 29, 2012

December 29

Chapter 71

The Rule of St. Benedict December 29


In Gethsemane we witness Jesus fully owning his emotions and desires, bringing them before his Abba whom he trusts, and fully releasing them with, "yet, not what I want, but what you want."

Our Father Benedict teaches us in this chapter that the road of obedience brings us to God, and I perceive that the road of obedience Jesus walked in Gethsemane is the same road we all must walk among our own emotions and desires.  It is a road from total ownership to complete release.

Benedictine obedience comes down the point at which we, in the thick of our emotions and desires submit to another.  It is a painfully difficult practice.  It requires the laying down of whatever story I tell myself that justifies my self-interested feelings and behavior.  And at no time are my self-interested feelings more intense than when I am in conflict.  Yet it is precisely at this point that our Father Benedict instructs us to face the matter head on, putting aside excuses or blame.  He would have us to own and release our feelings of self-interest.

The next time you find yourself being offended, imagine what it would take to extend a blessing rather than a rebuttal or a curse.  Seek the place within yourself from which you can own your feelings, release them to God, and genuinely offer a blessing to the one who has offended you.  And the next time you find yourself having given offense, imagine setting aside explanations and asking for unqualified forgiveness.  Seek the place within yourself that you do not need to defend, that is safe enough with God that you are able to be wrong.  This is the inner freedom that St. Benedict seeks to cultivate within us.

Br. Chad 2012

Friday, December 28, 2012

December 28

Feast of the Holy Innocents

Chapter 70

The Rule of St. Benedict December 28

On this feast, two weeks after the massacre in Newtown, CT, pray with me:

We remember today, O God, the slaughter of the holy innocents of Bethlehem by King Herod.  Receive, we pray, into the arms of your mercy all innocent victims; and by your great might frustrate the designs of evil tyrants and establish your rule of justice, love, and peace; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.
I have often found it easy to set myself up as judge and executer.  From my perspective trapped behind my two small eyes, I succumb to the temptation to act as though I see the world as it is, unadorned and objective.  My angry reactions are then justified as acts of defense in the service of Truth and Justice.  Our Father Benedict seeks to prevent this impulse here in Chapter 70.  Sr. Joan comments,
Benedictine spirituality depended on personal commitment and community support, not on intimidation and brutality.  Benedict makes it clear that the desire for good is no excuse for the exercise of evil on its behalf. . . . To become what we hate--as mean as the killers, as obsessed as the haters--is neither the goal nor the greatness of the spiritual life.
As Benedictines, let us consider carefully the posture we assume with each other, with those we encounter in our daily lives, and with our ideological adversaries.  As much as it appears at times to be the case, God has not set us up as vigilantes for God's own Truth.

Br. Chad 2012

Thursday, December 27, 2012

December 27

Feast of St. John, Apostle and Evangelist

The Rule of St. Benedict December 27


An unspoken assumption in this chapter provides a key to understanding its deepest meaning.  The assumption is that God is the one against whom any act of defense is undertaken in a Benedictine community.  Each member has handed himself over totally to being formed by God, a sacred relationship that must not be compromised by even the best of intentions.  Sr. Joan reflects,
In a life dedicated to spiritual growth and direction, there is no room for multiple masters. Friends who protect us from our need to grow are not friends at all.  People who allow a personal agenda, our need to be right or their need to shield, block the achievement of a broader vision in us and betray us.
It takes profound trust and true discipline both to submit to being formed and to keep from acting in another's defense when we perceive the need for protection or intervention on her behalf.  None of us can do the hard work of another's formation.  Each of us must entrust each other to the Master.

Br. Chad 2012

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

December 26

Feast of St. Stephen, Deacon and Martyr

Chapter 68

The Rule of St. Benedict December 26


Until one faces one's own resistance and overcomes one's own sense of inability, a human being is confined within the boundaries of personal desire, preference, and fear.  We are often in need of a firm shove if we are to transgress those boundaries.  Our Father Benedict desires to lead us beyond our self-imposed borders into an experience of Divine union wherein our personal identities are subsumed in God's creative work in the world around us.  We are to become vessels of Spirit, channels of Power through which the Kingdom of Heaven flows into our circumstances.

Each small breakthrough in the matter of prayer practice, in study, in work frees us more and more to listen to and obey God's voice rather than the voice of our resistance.  Each time we find that we were wrong about our inabilities, we find it easier to accept that we are not the designers of our own lives, that a larger Purpose is at play through us.  Each step outside of our own boundaries confirms to our soul the opening line of Psalm 127: "Unless the LORD builds the house, their labor is in vain who build it."

Br. Chad 2012

Tuesday, December 25, 2012

December 25

Feast of the Nativity of our Lord Jesus Christ

Chapter 67

The Rule of St. Benedict December 25


Christmas Eve services at our church seem to fill the pews with unfamiliar faces.  I see brave souls who venture into an unfamiliar church in search of something enchanting and mysterious on this holy night.  I watch the family members of a wife, a mother, or a grandmother who dutifully accompany her to her parish for the evening.  I feel the fear and sorrow of those seeking comfort on what is for them the darkest night of the year. 

Our Father Benedict acknowledges and seeks to deal here with this spiritual reality that I experience often in my life and work in church.  Each person brings with her to church an invisible crowd of other people and past experiences that affect the spiritual climate of the gathering.  Sometimes the presence of this unseen crowd is overwhelming.  Sometimes it is overwhelmed and ignored.

In a Benedictine community, ignoring it is not an option, so St. Benedict wisely makes the unseen dynamics explicit by establishing a protocol whereby the spiritual climate of the community can be cleansed. When we commit ourselves to a vowed life in a religious community, we place ourselves at the mercy of each other's inner well-being.  In a significant way, we release our right to carry our baggage alone and claim that its dark contents are nobody's business.  We own the fact that we were never successful in the first place at keeping the contents from spilling out onto the people around us.  With the illusion of independence removed and replaced with mutual commitment and compassion, we are able to unpack our bags in safety and begin the hard work of bringing what has sat in long darkness into the Light.

Br. Chad 2012